I've been depressed many times before, more times than I would like. Sometimes, I've felt completely alone, especially when I was figuring out that I was gay. But, I've never done any self harm, mainly because I don't have the guts to do it.
I'm terribly afraid of sharp or pointy things touching or being anywhere near me. There were times that I've felt like I wanted to end my life, but clearly, I never did, nor did I even take the first step to doing it.
I haven't been diagnosed if that's what you mean, but I would have to say...well, I don't know. Here are some of my "symptoms." -I never have any energy -I think life is pointless and agonizing -I hardly ever feel like doing anything besides staying in and watching tv -I hate myself and the stupid things that I say (this might be included) -I feel like people hate me as well -I feel like a burden to the others I'm around I don't know if I'd say that I "attempted suicide" or not, but I have had many thoughts about it, mostly when I was around 9 or 10- before or after my mother tried killing herself I'm not sure. I don't think I was serious about it, I just wanted to think I was I guess- looking through the knives in our kitchen when no one was up or even home for that matter.
I wasn't looking for attention from anyone else because I never told anyone up until last year. I guess I was just curious to see if I could do it, which I couldn't. But quiet frankly, I couldn't and wouldn't commit suicide, because that is something I find to be terribly weak.
I still think about it yes, but I don't know, maybe that's normal.
I cant really gove you an answer,but what I can give you is a way to a solution, that is you have to find the anglde that you relate to or peaks your interest. A good paper is one that people get drawn into because it reaches them ln some way.As for me WW11 to me, I think of the holocaust and the effect it had on the survivors, their families and those who stood by and did nothing until it was too late.