How can I encourage my child to talk about her chronic illness?

To keep the lines of communication open, you’re going to need to support your child, listen to her, and discuss her feelings about the illness. This will be hard, but save your tears for alone time because your child needs to feel that she can talk to you about the illness without your becoming upset. Rather than making this talk a one-way medical lecture, ask how your child is feeling and listen to everything before offering explanations or more information.

For many questions, you won’t have good answers. Neither will your pediatrician. If your child asks, “Why me?” it’s okay to say, “I don’t know.”

If your child says, “It’s not fair,” agree. If your child is angry about the illness, let her talk about that until she gets her feelings out. If your child asks what caused the illness or condition, and the answer isn’t clear, say, “I don’t know,” and stress the positive aspects of treatment and the prospect of improvement, if that’s the case.

From The Smart Parent's Guide: Getting Your Kids Through Checkups, Illnesses, and Accidents by Jennifer Trachtenberg.

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