How do I manage multiple sclerosis (MS) in my married life?

Management of multiple sclerosis (MS) in a marriage requires patience and understanding - qualities important to any marriage. And, presumably, you have a foundation of love and respect. You must also now sharpen your skills of communication and negotiation because your roles may have to change from time to time.

If your MS is in remission, there may be no problem to face but that of fatigue. As we've discussed, fatigue is a difficult symptom for another person to understand. You may look healthy, but you peter out before the end of the day.

Although treatments help a lot of people a lot of the time, they don't help everybody all of the time. If you've done your best to organize your day for maximum efficiency and you're still fatigued, you must help your spouse to understand that you can no longer do your share of duties. To make sure you don't neglect your spouse, it's important to let the car get dirty or the laundry pile up from time to time.

You may think about redefining your chores. It may work out better if the person with MS trades paying the bills for vacuuming or trades organizing the tax receipts for cleaning out the garage. When you're in a new attack, for one or two weeks or maybe as long as six, you may need your mate to help take over shopping, cooking, mowing the lawn, washing the car, cleaning up, and caring for the children.

In temporary situations like this, it is ideal for the welfare of you and your marriage to hire extra help. The maintenance of a small emergency fund for times like this will really help. It may reap benefits you can't put a price on.

Sometimes the spouse is a wonderful person but just not in the particular role he or she is being asked to fill. Don't force it; hire someone to take over the chore.

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