How do you get over someone that promised not to hurt you, someone that you saw yourself marrying some day?

I fell in love with a man that said that it was over with his wife(she moved out of the home, went back to her ex) so we started dating. I had never been with someone that treated me so loving, so good. Treated my child like his own and I was the same with his (they still visit me).

One day out of the blue, he went back to his wife and now I am stuck trying to keep my emotions from exploding. I see him almost everyday. This was not my first relationship, I ended my marriage two years ago (he was addicted to drugs and verbally abusive).

I just feel like I am a magnet for heart ache. When I ended my marriage I was not in love with him, so that was easy to get over, but with this guy I want to be with him, but its just not possible. What can I do?

Asked by KS1977 40 months ago Similar questions: promised hurt marrying day Lifestyle > Relationships.

Similar questions: promised hurt marrying day.

Time really is a great healer....let yourself go through the grieving process. Time really is a great healer and as much as it hurts right now, in time it will get better. Let yourself go through the grieving process then pick yourself up by the bootstraps, focus on your child and move forward.

This happened for a reason and there is someone else out there who will be better for you.

Danger Town There really is nothing worse in life than a broken heart. This guy sounds like a jerk. Any guy that plays with your emotions and then does what he did to you, is a jerk.

There is a chance that he may try to come back to you again, if he does it is important that you don't take him back. If he has hurt you once, there is an incredibly high chance he'll hurt you again. You need to take control.

I know it'll hurt, but this temporary pain is nothing compared to the long life heartache he could cause you in the future if you were to be together. There's that phase 'Love hurts', and it is very true and in most cases unavoidable throughout one's life. Now's the hard part....how to move on from him.

Take up some activities that you like to do and what makes you feel good. I find attending fun gym classes like yoga, kickboxing and bellydancing works wonders for me. It gets the adrenalin running and creates endophins which are meant to make you happy.

You could also take up meditation. Just half an hour a day can really help your stress levels and sadness. I find Dr Jeffrey Thompson's CDs to be a brillant help.

They really work. I find I come out feeling refreshed and rejuvenated. Go out and have fun.

Go out with your girlfriends and have a couple of drinks and a dance or a gossip. Maybe go see how many hot males you can spot and talk to. You are never too old to do things like this :) If you are feeling really depressed or upset, it might be worth having a chat to a councellor or even a GP who can refer you onto someone else who might be of assistance to you.

Remember that you are never alone. Many many females suffer heartache many times throughout their lives. I have plenty of times!

And I know how hard and depressing it can be. Sometimes having a chat to someone who can listen and maybe give you some advice, is a big help on its own. I hope this helps.

Just remember have fun, seek assistance if you need and pamper yourself! Look after yourself and take control. You deserve so much more than being with a jerk!

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Many people have gone through this type of thing, you are not alone, and you will get over it and hopefully. Be stronger in the long run. Since my daughter's divorce almost 5 years ago, she has been disapointed many times.

One relationship, she thought was very serious, had a bad outcome, and broke her heart. My stepson was 2 when they met, and when they split up over 2 years later he was very hurt and confused also. One thing she learned from it is how important it is to keep her son from getting attached to the men she dates.

You mention you have children also, so I'm sure you know what I'm talking about. My daughter says she will never "play house" with another man - meaning move in, along with her child, without getting married and having a commitment made first. She has dated several men since, but doesn't allow them to meet her son for a long while into the relationship, and when and if she decides to, she doesn't call the man her "boyfriend", but keeps it on a friendship basis, so not to confuse her son, or raise his expectations again.

She still has her dissapointments, but is slowly learning that Mr. Right may never come along, and she is pursuing her own interests, and making new female friends to do things with. You will go on, and you will get over, and hopefully learn more about yourself, and how to respect and take care of yourself along the way. Good luck, and God Bless, and put yourself and your children first, always!

Sources: Living and learning .

Time will ease the pain I had a very similar experience. I had no children then, but I fell head over heels for a married man. I was only 19 at the time.

Shortly after we met, he left his wife. When he left me, he went back to his wife. I was devastated.

When he left his wife and came back to me again. I could not stop hurting even though I "had him back. " I also felt very guilty about hurting another woman.

This time I left. I have never stopped thinking about this man and how when I told him goodbye, we just held one another and sobbed. I recently got in touch with him again and we have an email relationship that is very sporadic and not in any way sexual in nature.

He is married and even asked his wife if this would bother her. She said it did not. I am very glad to just know he is out there and that we can do it right this time without hurting others.

Time will heal these wounds. You know that logically, but emotionally it will be some time before you can come to grips with that. Even if he were to come back to you, remember it could never be the same again.

There would always be resentment, pain and some sense of distrust. Better to give yourself plenty of time to heal and do not worry about having a man in your life until you figure out why you seem to attract the wrong people. It is the perfect opportunity to work on self discovery.

Good luck to you. Move forward always not backwards.

He's not going to come back. He treated you so well because his wife left him and he needed someone. She was always his first priority and it sucks that you got caught up in his web..

" "I go to the gym twice a day and run a mile or two each time. One person said that you could get hurt...is that possible? " "Love and marriage......now that Valentine's Day has passed, what's wrong with marrying for love......only for love?

" "relationships without hurt are like oceans without water?" "Should I be Hurt? " "Why do my arches in my feet always hurt by mid-day and are swollen 2 sizes by the end of the day? " "Why do muscles begin to hurt only a day or two after a workout?" "Here, as promised, is the story ..." "How come relationships are so different now?

" "Do you really want to hurt me?

I go to the gym twice a day and run a mile or two each time. One person said that you could get hurt...is that possible?

I cant really gove you an answer,but what I can give you is a way to a solution, that is you have to find the anglde that you relate to or peaks your interest. A good paper is one that people get drawn into because it reaches them ln some way.As for me WW11 to me, I think of the holocaust and the effect it had on the survivors, their families and those who stood by and did nothing until it was too late.