My sister's husband won't let her learn how to drive. He "jokes" she would "drive away" and leave him. She feels entrapped - how can I help her?

You can help her by telling her it is not his choice whether she learns how to drive. She lives in America, not Iran. What would she do if tomorrow he decided she could not wear her clothes but had to wear a long robe and cover her face in public?

What if he decides she needs to walk 10 feet behind him?.... oh wait I see he makes her do that already - psychologically speaking.

All ya'all need some serious counseling in my opinion.

I have to agree with duffsmom, advisor4qb and silvatungfox. He is a control freak and she is letting him control her and probably in a lot more ways than just preventing her from learning to drive. I knew someone in a similar situation who also was not "allowed" to learn to drive.

She relied on her husband to drive her so this meant they did everything together and while he was at work she was housebound. They lived on a rural property with no neighbours nearby. She was not "allowed " friends either, he told her all her friends were sluts that would lead her astray.

Funny thing happened though, one day, he got bitten by a wasp and he was allergic to them. He got really ill and began to panic that he may go into shock so he decides he should go to the hospital. Well of course he has to drive because she wasn't "allowed" to learn.

A few miles down the road he does indeed go into shock and runs them both off the road. This was before cell phones so things were looking bad for him. Fortunately (or unfortunately) a car comes by and the guy loads him and her into his vehicle and dash him to the hospital.

I think there was a valuable lesson learned that day as she now has her license. Maybe you could point this out to your sisters husband, it is always good to be able to drive in an emergency situation, the life she saves might be his!

Won't "let" her learn to drive. Anytime I hear the word "let" with regard to husband and wife, I see red flags for abuse and control. Gently encourage her to realize she does not need to live under his thumb.

He needs counseling. Encourage her to talk to someone about her situation and see if she is ready to "drive away.

He is a narcissist. He is using her helplessness to control her. How convenient for him to always know where she is!

Sounds like the husband requires counseling with his insecurity. To help you sister, maybe they could BOTH attend the counseling and work around his insecurity issues.

I cant really gove you an answer,but what I can give you is a way to a solution, that is you have to find the anglde that you relate to or peaks your interest. A good paper is one that people get drawn into because it reaches them ln some way.As for me WW11 to me, I think of the holocaust and the effect it had on the survivors, their families and those who stood by and did nothing until it was too late.