The scenario is that your mother at age 68 has a stroke and refuses to do her therapy so she ends up paralyzed on one side and unable to?

I can't speak for everyone else, but my mother is extremely paranoid of nursing home. I would bring her home, but I would hire a nurse to take care of her because first, if I quit working, then how can I pay for myself or my mother. Then I don't have the patience or the energy to take care of someone to that extent.

If I try to do it myself, I would drive both of us crazy and lead to a resentment. I don't want both of us to hate each other before my mom passed away. I know this might not be feasible for people in the Western country, because caretakers in here cost a lot less than my salary, even if I just work as a teacher.

I would also ask my sister to help pay the bills, though I don't expect much from her as she's married and she's usually broke.

This scenario would occasion my siblings and myself to be bear the financial and time burdens that such a sad situation would entail. She is our mother, I cannot see any of us agreeing to having her placed in a nursing home when there are six of us. Based on our individual financial situations, we would all contribute to hire the staff required to make her home care possible.

Based on our family and work schedules at that time, we would likely establish a situation were our mother would stay at one of our households for three to six months at a time, then moving on to the other, so as not to over burden only one of us. Just leaving our mother in a nursing home, no matter how reputable the establishment, I cannot fathom that.

I think a nursing home is the best choice by far. Even if you have good intentions, you likely haven't had the schooling and experience to really do a great job. Most people want the best care available, and the people that do the best job are those that do it for a living.

Part of the prompt says that she can't talk but if she can spell out what she needs and wants either by pointing to letters or even writing with the hand that still works, then I would really have to consider her feelings in the situation. Caring for someone full time like that is a huge burden and it can be very emotionally, physically, and financially draining. I'm not sure how I would be able to pay bills and not work.

However, if she wanted to be home with me, and I could work from home and get in home help, then I would choose that route for as long as I could do it. There may come a time when it would be impossible to keep up and a nursing home would have to be the alternative but I would make sure it was a good one (or as good as could be afforded) and then make sure it was close so I could be there as much as possible.

If I was the 68 year old mother, I would hope my children would put me in a nursing care facility. Love and good intentions aside, caregiving is a stressful occupation. An overwhelmed caregiver can easily become a bad caregiver.

I really believe that a parent who knows that they are loved and respected will be able to adapt to the decision made by the child who is forced to make that hard decision.

I would put her into a nursing home, simply because I know what is involved in the care of someone like that, and I could not handle it. Could you change your mother's messy diapers? I couldn't.

I just don't have what it takes. Of course, I would visit her as often as humanly possible, and spend time with her outside the nursing home.

I would have her moved in with me and hire a nurse for her here. I don't believe people should be put into nursing homes until their mental capacity is gone and they no longer know who or whats aroud them. But if they recognize you and know of their surroundings even if you can't understand you will learn to.

I guess if you had to quit your job then how would you live so that changes things.

I cant really gove you an answer,but what I can give you is a way to a solution, that is you have to find the anglde that you relate to or peaks your interest. A good paper is one that people get drawn into because it reaches them ln some way.As for me WW11 to me, I think of the holocaust and the effect it had on the survivors, their families and those who stood by and did nothing until it was too late.