Firstly, you have somehow gotten confused. The harmonic minor and the major mode are not at all the same. If you compare the major mode to the harmonic minor, you will find that the 3rd steps and the 6th steps of the minor are one half step lower than in the Major mode.
Perhaps you were confused by the fact that the natural minor mode is built on the 6th degree of the relative Major scale. Let's look at the case of C major and a minor, which are relative. A natural minor uses all the same notes as the C scale, but begins and ends on A.
A harmonic minor can be seen as altering the natural minor by raising the 7 degree by one half step -- the G becomes a G#. Melodic minor has two forms -- ascending and descending. In the ascending form the 6th and 7th steps are raised.
The F and G become F# and G#. But the descending form is exactly the same as the natural minor. Hope this was helpful.
G. EDIT Ah -- indeed that is a different question. And a good one.
The very reason for raising the 7th tone of the harmonic and ascending melodic minor is to preserve those tendencies for the leading tone. What can become confusing is the whole "ascending" and "descending" thing, which I have always maintained is nonsensical. The choice of scale used has less to do with the direction of the scale, and more to do with the underlying harmony.
If the harmony is dominant, the "ascending" form is dictated, whereas if a subdominant type of harmony is in play, then a descending form (the natural minor) will likely be more apt. So the 7th degree of natural minor (and "Descending melodic") can no longer function as a leading tone, and tends to want to resolve to 6 (unless we are truly writing modally, in which case we throw the idea of tendency tones out the window.) As far as other tendency tones are concerned, they, for the most part, stay intact -- 4 resolves downward to 3, but without as much strength, unless accompanied by the leading tone. One of the more interesting aspects of the minor mode is the 6th tone, which has a strong downward tendency.
It is this tendency which lends strength to the augmented 6th chord in it's various forms, and its close relative, the neopolitan 6th. Once again, I hope this helps. G.
The major scale in whole and half (and augmented) tones is - wwhwwwh. The harmonic minor is whwwhah. The melodic minor is whwwwwh (ascending) and whwwhww decending.
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