Why do emotionally abused women stay with thier husband?

Why do emotionally abused women stay with thier husband Asked by UpNIn 2 months ago Similar questions: emotionally abused women stay thier husband Society > Women.

Similar questions: emotionally abused women stay thier husband.

Sometimes they stay put for the sake of the childrenFearSelf-blameLack of knowledge on where to go elsewhere or what to doNo money to pay for major change move .

Thank you for your response as it pertains to a dear friend of mine, whose husband verbally abuses her. She has mentioned that she is afraid. I get mixed signals from her.

Sometimes stating that she hates him, other times that they are soo done, and on other occasions that she would like for him to change (which I believe is impossible). This particular women also, believes that he may be cheating on her, and if she found that to be true, would be the catalyst to make her leave. I personally don't know if she will leave him, if she does confirm that he was cheating.

And I wonder I'm wondering, in your experience, what is the Catalyst or turning point in an abusive relationship which causes the spouse to leave? UpNIn 2 months ago .

If there are no children it makes it easier to walk away. The turning point is usually violence of some kind but it can be many things, even addiction to drugs or alcohol; in this case it might be another woman. Where there is no more love and caring then there is nothing to hold her there anymore.

Perhaps let her know there is help, somewhere she can turn to if worse comes to worse.

There are cycles in the relationship. Periods of ups (where everything is just fine... flowers, doors being held open, etc...Then there are periods of yelling, intimidation, and abuse. Followed again, by the make up cycle.As SICK as this may sound, it has been my observation.

And it is only an observation, that I believe the make up SEX is a part of the equation. Perhaps the husband/abuser sees this as a weakness with his partner/wife who is submitting to him both emotionally and physically. And also perhaps by the wife who is relieved that things are now back in order?

I realize that this may be a sensitive subject but if anyone has any first hand knowledge or has spoken to someone about this and has any relevant information, I would like to hear what they have to say. The reason that I'm asking is that my friend (the wife) has told me on numerous occasions that her abusive husband, picked a fight over meaningless subjects. However on two occasions after she went through a screaming match with him, she quickly turned around to face him, startling him.

What she saw both perplexed and confused her. She saw a sly smile from his face. Almost like the fight was planned and calculated.

She also told me that latter on they reconnected. Which is a nice way to say that they had Make-Up Sex. Your insight would be most appreciated and helpful.

UpNIn 2 months ago .

Because they still want him to love them. They need that love deep inside. They need to find good in him even if its something really small.

They hold on to it.

I've wondered about that my entire life..Seeminly intelligent, attractive women who stay (for years), with roaring alcoholics, druggies, wife beaters, serial cheaters, losers, and/or screwballs..I've known quite a few...Most often it's financial, maybe the kids.. But, I can't help believing that some of them actually get so far gone they LIKE IT...Now the opposite extreme, is a MAN (in his late 50's), that leaves swell wife, kids, home, to marry a 19 year old hairdresser..Well, she is good looking, but this is---NUTS! (an aquaintence of mine)..SO, next time Mrs. Kymlor complains about my fatal flaw ( lousy at loading the dishwasher), she should be thankful...

A part of me believes that the abused, without knowing it, and a result of being isolated as well, has a defense mechanism which is to submit, to try to appease the abuser. The abuser, as a result of isolation, and abuse, becomes the entire universe to those that they abuse. They only know or can think of one option, which is a short term fix, which is to try to bond with the abuser.

Unfortunately, I believe that this bonding enables the abuser and escalates the problem because the abuser now has more power and control over his spouse. What are your thoughts? UpNIn 2 months ago .

Sometimes they are afraid because some abusive men threaten to kill them if they leave. Scary part is some men do kill them if they try.

The guy maybe charm/abusive...so they wait for the good times. Fear....he threatens if they leave he will kill someone.

Because the abuser does all he can to make the thought of leaving more scary than the thought of staying.

I would appreciate your opinion or insight. UpNIn 2 months ago .

Well, for emotional abuse, the abuser most commonly works to brainwash the victim into believing they cannot get along without their abuser. The next favorite is to brainwash them into believing thay will suffer worse abuse if they try to leave.

And all abusers work to brainwash their victims into believing they don't deserve any better.

From your description of the relationship, he almost sounds bipolar.

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Can I call child services on someone if you believe child is being emotionally abused.

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Sometimes they are afraid because some abusive men threaten to kill them if they leave. Scary part is some men do kill them if they try. Grandmabx 50 months ago.

I cant really gove you an answer,but what I can give you is a way to a solution, that is you have to find the anglde that you relate to or peaks your interest. A good paper is one that people get drawn into because it reaches them ln some way.As for me WW11 to me, I think of the holocaust and the effect it had on the survivors, their families and those who stood by and did nothing until it was too late.