Why don't girls like nice guys? I see many beauties with complete jerks. So, women like to be treated badly?

I see many beauties with complete jerks. So, women like to be treated badly? Seriously, so many beautiful girls out there and they go for the selfish idiots who use them.

Do girls really judge self-confidence in men by how much of an egotist they are? How much they take from you? How much of an ass they are?

Or is it that girls are blind to bad treatment? Somebody unlock the universe and pry this puppy from its' arms. Asked by beefykieth 55 months ago Similar questions: girls nice guys beauties complete jerks women treated badly Entertainment > Humor.

Similar questions: girls nice guys beauties complete jerks women treated badly.

They usually grow out of it I’ve discussed this ad nauseam with female friends, trying to understand the phenomenon myself. Here’s what I’ve learned. For one thing, self-confidence is infectious.

People who are self-confident (as jerks often are) inspire the idea that interesting, fun, exciting things are happening around them. Young women love excitement. Nice guys can be boring.

More importantly, lack of self-confidence is a major turn-off. If they’re not confident in themselves, why should you be? So women tend to dismiss them without getting to know them.

That can easily turn into a spiral for a guy: the nice guys lose even more confidence, and eventually become desperate, and desperation is the kiss of death. Eventually they get bitter, but by then it’s too late for that bitterness to be exciting. Jerks have better luck because they don’t care.

A nice guy doesn’t say, " let’s go have sex in the back room", because he doesn’t want to offend you, and it hurts him when you say "no". A jerk doesn’t give a rat’s ass what you think of him. So if you say yes, he wins; if you say no, he moves on to the next one.

Many women find that dominant, risk-taking behavior exciting, and by the time they realize the obvious fact that only a jerk would ask, they’ve already done the nasty. Nice guys don’t piss off your parents. Don’t forget the teenage rebellion factor.

Who would want to date a man her mother would approve of. It’s not until they reach 30 or so that she realizes that her mother isn’t an idiot. There also seems to be a strong streak of "he’s bad but I can make him good" in a lot of women.

They see the bad boys as a challenge: well, he was an exciting jerk to you, but I’m such a great woman that he’ll treat me well because he’ll want to keep me. It might have worked once, for somebody. Possibly back in the seventies.

I’ll double check. There’s another interesting notion from the realm of evolutionary psychology. They see all human behavior in terms of reproduction.

If a behavior trait helps people reproduce, you see more of it in the next generation. (Never mind that nobody knows how a gene can affect behavior traits, or how a gene could code for "being a jerk" or "liking jerks". But it does seem to happen, and they hope to figure out the mechanism later.) From this perspective, a man means two different things to a woman: giving his genes to his children, and caring for her and those children.

Why would you necessarily want these to be the same man? The colorful rascal is very good at spreading his genes, and those genes will help carry your genes on, too. But he’s lousy at raising children.

That divides guys into "guys you date" and "guys you marry". And what you really want (from this point of view) is to marry a nice guy and then get impregnated by a jerk. But women seem to get this in the wrong order: they date jerks when they’re young, but they usually decide they want to settle down around age 28-30 these days.

That’s because society has messed up our genes, and our most fertile period is younger than the age we wish to look around for a mate. Or more accurately, we’re physically and sexually attracted to young jerks, and the idea of finding a responsible nice guy doesn’t kick in until we’re older and more experienced. Unfortunately, there seems to be no cure for this.

Fun and self-destructive behavior is burned into the souls of young people: they drink to excess for the same reasons. No matter how much older, wiser women tell them otherwise, they’ll fall for the jerks every time.So best of luck, Keith. You’re never going to fix the women, so you can try to fix yourself.

Don’t get discouraged, even though the women are giving you excellent reason to get discouraged.As you get older, the women will gradually realize that the bad boys aren’t so-bad-they’re-good; they’re just losers. And don’t be afraid to take a few more chances than you do right now. It sucks to get rejected, but go ahead and ask.It really doesn’t do them any harm, and if you figure out how to not take it personally you can do a lot better.

You won’t win if you don’t ask. Just try to avoid becoming a jerk yourself: be smooth, be confident, but don’t be pushy or arrogant..

It is actually a very logical conundrum. It has to do with biological attraction. Of course this does not apply to all women, or even most women.

Please do not mistake this answer for a stereotype of all women, just an explanation for the female phenomenon observed above. Women are not attracted to selfish men, or big egos, or being treated bad, or jerks. Women are attracted to handsome men, and will wait in line (as quietly as possible) for their turn at his affections.It is a competition as old as sexual reproduction.

When the current target of the affection leaves or is dumped, the handsome man is almost attacked with invitations by other women to target them. Human beings being what they are, how much effort would this hypothetical man put out to care about the feelings and needs of these women. Wouldn't your ego explode if you were constantly hunted by beautiful women?

He selects another woman to give his affection to (or perhaps more than one as the asker has noticed) and enjoys the "getting to know you" stage of the relationship for as long as it lasts. Once in the relationship, it can be hard for the woman to admit that it was the wrong decision and part ways. Once the current woman gets wise that the handsome features of the man and the prestige of being connected with him is not worth the the lack of caring for her needs, she leaves or is dumped and the cycle begins again.

Your question revolves around why the women line up. Some do recognize the cycle and cut their losses to pursue less handsome but more caring men (that would be me). Others want the fantasy.

Perhaps they will be the one to tame him. Perhaps the initial ride is worth the less than happy ending. Perhaps someone that good-looking can't be as bad as they say.

Lonelyness can warp logic. To often the jilted woman will pursue another handsome man and join another vicious cycle.To all the women out there, get past the looks and the popularity. The man behind them has been spoiled to the point that if it is not you, it will be someone else.

Picture what he will look like with a beer belly and no hair. Unless you are only in it for the short term anyway. Sources: Personal observations .

Somehow there thinking changes when they get a little older Since I’m one of the nice guys I will answer from this side of the perspective. It is interesting but they have done studies where the girls will date the "dangerous" types. But end up wanting to marry the nice guys.

There seems to be a dichotomy between having fun and later wanting to be married with kids and stability and all that. I did have an interesting conversation with one of the girls at work. And she was lamenting (and she was not the only one) how come all the nice guys were taken.

The kept asking me (the married one) if I knew any nice guys (i did, and I should have started charging for it) These girls were cute and they had gone out with the dangerous jerks. One described it as a thrill to go out with someone that could be that way, but afterwards in a month or two it was I gotta lose that loser! So it may be that time works to your advantage as they go thru the phase and find out what they don’t really want.By that time a lot of the nice ones are allready taken.

So there is hope for you Be yourself and they will eventually find you. You will be surprised how fast the time flys and how far people grow. Remember when they were getting interested in boys, most boys were interested in anything but girls.

So its partly our fault for ignoring them in the beginning. Sources: just my opinion louie_cat's Recommendations The Nice Guys' Guide to Getting Girls 2: You CAN be a Nice Guy & STILL Attract Women! Amazon List Price: $14.95 Used from: $8.49 Average Customer Rating: 3.0 out of 5 (based on 9 reviews) Nice Guys And Players: Becoming the Man Women Want Amazon List Price: $10.00 Used from: $8.99 Average Customer Rating: 4.0 out of 5 (based on 48 reviews) I Love You, Nice to Meet You: A Guy and a Girl Give the Lowdown on Coupling Up Amazon List Price: $19.95 Used from: $2.47 Average Customer Rating: 4.0 out of 5 (based on 5 reviews) .

It's not fair Well ya know beefykieth ,sometimes women have to be treated badly before they can appreciate a good man, unfortunately. Not all women are that way, she's out there. When we are young it has a lot to do with physical attraction and the chase.It's not just men that like to have a little mystery in the game.

It helps if the guy doesn't go overboard in his pursuing of the one that peaks his interest and doesn't lay all his feelings out about how beautiful she is ect.... It's sad, because if you are the type who likes to be straight up honest right away about your feelings the girl may run. I think if she can't see your a great guy , it's her loss. Good Luck to you.

I'll put on my psychology hat here! Lots of those women come from homes with spousal abuse. They have grown up watching their mothers treated like crap.So, they look for a guy the same as dear ole' dad!

It's a shame, but they really don't know any better! I'm not saying it is the only reason here, but it is one. Another reason may be that they were raised in a very strict home.

Never could do anything fun, so when they leave the nest, they want all the excitement they can get. Some gals get bored when everything is going great, so they like the on-the-edge type guy. If given more time, I'm sure I could think of some more examples, but in general, most ladies, beautiful or not, really like to be treated well.

You just need to find the girls who are more balanced and have self-esteem. They wouldn't let anyone take advantage of them! Personally, I despise the bad guy types and think they are missing something in their lives also, like a good father figure!

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I cant really gove you an answer,but what I can give you is a way to a solution, that is you have to find the anglde that you relate to or peaks your interest. A good paper is one that people get drawn into because it reaches them ln some way.As for me WW11 to me, I think of the holocaust and the effect it had on the survivors, their families and those who stood by and did nothing until it was too late.