Any ideas for tasty vegan foods that non-vegans would enjoy as well?

I've been to events like that before. When food is pre-ordered for the group, the restaurant will still be happy to make a dish ordered on-the-spot to accommodate special needs. They are used to doing things like that, so don't worry, you should be able to order anything you want - pasta with marinara, eggplant without parm, salad, broccoli saute, whatever.

The only thing to consider is that it sounds like your mom is a little resentful of your "special requests" and isn't going to want to help you out at all. So you may want to bring your own money so you can pay for the meal that you order when you're there, in case she insists that she already ordered food and you could have just eaten what she got so she won't pay for your extra food. Don't make a big deal of it, just choose something off the menu when you get there, order it discreetly from the server, and offer the money to your mom at the end, or get a separate check.

First off find out what restaurant and what menu items your Mom ordered. See if there is a website for the restaurant so you can look up the menu items and get a feel for what's in them. If you feel comfortable call the restaurant and enquire.

Secondly, you need to speak to your Mom about her comment that "it won't kill me for one day". How long have you been vegan? If you have been vegan for a long time and you ingest something that you haven't eaten in ages it may not "kill" you but it may make you very ill or even cause abdominal pains.

She may not understand the mental aspect of what she says to you but she needs to be aware of the physical. You also should probably eat a full meal just before you go out to the party that way you will not be hungry and if they by chance do have things you can snack on that are vegan friendly you can do that. Just because it is an Italian restaurant it doesn't mean that there won't be things you can have but you should definitely do your research.

Good luck to you.

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