How do I get my 3yo daughter to stay in bed at night? She gets out for a variety of reasons every night?

As long as she isn't keeping you or others from getting rest, her sleep cycle really isn't your concern. Some people are naturally "night people", and in the modern world that can be completely supported with work, shopping, etc. during the overnight hours. If she's up at 3:00 pm and to bed around 5 - 6:00 am, she is sleeping about 9 hours every 24 hour cycle.

That's not excessive, and it doesn't seem fair to call her lazy just because she has different sleep habits than you do. There are questions that are more important than "does she stay up all night?". These include: -Is she a college student?

And if so, is she attending classes and passing exams? -If she isn't a college student, does she have a job? And does she show up for it as needed, and manage her money passably well?

-Many people are off, living on their own by age 20. Have you welcomed her to stay with you, or is she outstaying her welcome/taking advantage? -Since she lives with you, is she a respectful housemate?

Does she help out with things like dishes, tidying, and shopping? Does she keep her spaces of the home passably clean? You may realize that the issues with your daughter have less to do with when she sleeps, and more to do with what she *doesn't* do when she is awake.

Either way, yelling won't fix anything. It is appropriate for you as her parent to set some specific boundaries, such as "If you're going to live here, you need to be in school or working. If working, you need to chip in for expenses.

And, either way, you need to help out around the house and keep your spaces (room, bathroom) reasonably clean." If clarifications like these are needed, sit down and talk it out until you're both clear about it, rather than just reacting with anger or frustration in passing. The transition from being your actual child to being your grown adult child may require some shifts in thought and behavior from both of you.

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