How do I get the abusive narcissist to recognize himself?

It's not easy to recognize an abusive person. They have learned how to hide it well. But jealousy and controlling behavior are signs.

These things can be flattering sometimes and the abuser will say it's because he/she love you, but it's really about one's insecurity and need to control. Someone that hits the wall or breaks things is likely to be abusive. Obviously past abuse, either by that person or done to that person, can be an indicator.

It is a vicious cycle. They also usually don't take responsibility for things, instead blaming others. Low self-esteem is a characteristic but so is a really inflated sense of worth - the macho man who thinks women should stay in certain roles and know their "place".

Abuse can be emotional, psychological and/or physical, so I do believe most people have experienced some sort of abuse.

They usually are quickly irritated if someone they percieve has having a lower rank then them disagrees with them in front of others. If you are with the person and someone they think is "nobody" slights them and then they complain bitterly about it afterward that's a good sign. An abusive person does not tolerate when someone weaker crosses them.

An honorable person sees disagreement with someone at the same rank higher rank or lower rank as the same insult. The abusive person is more agressive to the person with less power. That's a good sign.

I cant really gove you an answer,but what I can give you is a way to a solution, that is you have to find the anglde that you relate to or peaks your interest. A good paper is one that people get drawn into because it reaches them ln some way.As for me WW11 to me, I think of the holocaust and the effect it had on the survivors, their families and those who stood by and did nothing until it was too late.