I have one Motto, for a lack of a better term, about this sort of people and life in general. "Do Not Be Victimized! " Opening up opportunities, for these types of co-workers to gain leverage on you.
There are several things you have to realize, about these types of people; But dealing with them demands some "self examination". Finding yourself being compromised, is usually becuase you were either in the area of a negative event, or because you might have attempted to "cut corners" and put yourself in the the cross hairs of the person. Normally, If you examine the situations, where this co-worker has ran to the boss and threw you under the bus, you may find that your hands were not totally clean (That is you had some involvement in the situation.)Here are some suggestions as to removing yourself from the situation: 1.
Remove yourself from the situation, by removing the opportunity for this person to have access to you. 2. Make sure you are not "cutting corners". 3.
If you make a mistake, or cause an event that may put you in a negative light; always be the first to inform your boss. Never allow the opportunity for the "Control Freak" to get the jump on you. 4.
When confronted, after the boss has heard the "hottest" news about your faults, Take responsibility, Describe why you did what you did, and take the time to clear up untrue or fuzzy details that were not included in the remote citing of the incident. Even if it means, letting the boss know what roles the reporting party had in the events. This is only a few suggestions, but with only these things in hand, you will find that the "control" is returned to you.
Therefore, when that opportunisitic and power hungery person has the "fire" dausted, they look like a foolish child. This has played well, in my life. "Power playing", "Self-serving" and "Controlling" are signs of insuecurity, in the person whom consumes him/herself in the practice(s), and typically has to validate themselves, as "model" employs or bosses whom are important to the over all security of the business.
Believe that they have no true thoughts of the status of the business; Only themselves.
Jerks, enemies, and a-holes are believe it or not very important in our spiritual development. These folks have been put in our path to test us on how far we have progressed on the path of love. Jesus said "love thy enemies", and there is a reason for that.
The best way to handle one of these people is to send them silent love, and to let them be themselves. If you are able to send these folks love, you will see a change come about in how they treat you. That will mean you have passed that test.
I talk about this in my post "The Importance of Enemies".
I had co workers like this in the past and found that most of the time these people were insecure in their lives. Being a pain in the ass was often a mechanism to gain attention and feel important. If you try giving them attention instead of conflict it might work, if not you are still the bigger person for trying to work it out.
Easier said than done perhaps but I never had a problem to try it and it did work!
I had co workers like this in the past and found that most of the time these people were insecure in their lives. Being a pain in the ass was often a mechanism to gain attention and feel important.
I cant really gove you an answer,but what I can give you is a way to a solution, that is you have to find the anglde that you relate to or peaks your interest. A good paper is one that people get drawn into because it reaches them ln some way.As for me WW11 to me, I think of the holocaust and the effect it had on the survivors, their families and those who stood by and did nothing until it was too late.