Is it wrong to harbor a strong personal dislike for one of your sister-in-laws?

It depends on how bad they are. If it's a child molester or serial killer, or mass murderer, go ahead and dislike them, I would say. Even an outspoken racist is worthy of some pretty strong dislike.

Some people are mean, hateful and spiteful. They are unkind to children and disrespectful to the elderly. Life is too short to spend wasting time on them and too long to spend putting up with their nonsense.So, if it's a really bad person, dislike all you want.

If they just rub you the wrong way, I agree with the folks who voted for polite.

Feeling aren't wrong. Feelings are feelings. Actions can be wrong.(Sorry, this answer is going to be written as if this were non-hypothetical--just easier that way) If you don't like her, I don't think you need to try to convince yourself to like her.

You don't even to go out of your way to be nice to her. But as part of a family, I believe you do have the obligation to keep the peace. People should not have to choose sides, and everyone should be able to get together and enjoy the entire family, without worrying about the two of you.

I'm from a family that someone felt entitled to rip in half. Don't be the person who rips your family apart. Since you don't like her, I would recommend disclosing it to a couple of family members, in a nonjudgmental way, so they can help you keep the peace by running interference.

Just something like "Susan and I just don't see eye-to-eye. I don't want to cause any drama, so can you please just help me out, if you see some tension rising, or if one of us just won't back off? Maybe you could just step in and lighten the mood, or ask me to help you with something in another room?"

If you can hash it out with her, great. If not, I think a truce is good enough. There are always people you don't like, and family is no exception.

You didn't pick her. You have to be fair to everyone, but you do not have to like this woman.

The thing about feelings is that, generally speaking, you can't help them. Worrying about a personal feeling you have never works out in the long run. It just causes more stress and, ultimately, hurts that relationship -- often making the dislike even stronger.So it's best just not to be close to that person.

It's just a sister-in-law; she doesn't live with you or anything. There's no rule saying you have to have a close relationship; some blood siblings aren't even close. You don't have to be rude to her, but you're under no obligation to go out of your way to befriend you.

Not everyone is meant to be friends, after all. In-laws or not.

I don't think so. The fact that you've even used the term "personal dislike" says to me that you're being as objective as possible. If someone consistently rubs you the wrong way, it's only natural that your desire to be around that person is going to decrease.

Also, when necessary, you will still likely be able to get along with this person thanks to your maturity and professionalism.

I agree with the general consensus. I don't think it is wrong to dislike your sister in law. You really cannot help that.

I do think that unless she is a criminal you do need to be polite to her and keep the peace. I do think it is horribly wrong to tell others that they must be impolite to her. It is absolutely heartbreaking that families have been split up over pettiness like this.

It's not wrong to dislike someone; there will always be people that rub us the wrong way for one reason or another. We can choose our friends, but we don't always get to choose our extended family members. For the sake of keeping the peace in the family, though, we need to learn to at least get along with people we aren't fond of.

I've always felt it was best to treat everybody with kindness, no matter how we feel about them personally. Some people are just bad-natured and difficult to get along with, and usually those people are the ones who need our love the most.

Yes, I think it is wrong. I personally saw my sister absolutely refuse to be nice to her sister-in-law (I'll call her Ann), the latter being one of the sweetest women I have ever known! My sister took it to the level of telling our mother and me that WE should have nothing to do with Ann.

However, I'd been friends with Ann for many years, and I knew how good she treated my mother, so I refused to go along with that "dictate". However, my mother felt allegiance to my sister and would cut short the phone calls she received from Ann. Then Mother would call me and tell me how it upset her to do that.

I kept telling her that my sister had no right to tell us who to have in our lives, but Mother wouldn't listen. Meanwhile, Ann could never figure out what she had done to warrant such treatment. She tried to be nice and friendly but had to give up when my sister insisted on being mean and nasty to her.

What is the point? The brothers involved (husbands of both women) had to suffer, too, since they couldn't be as close as they wanted to be because they had to stick up for their wives. Such a waste of emotion, time, and lives!

It's not wrong but you should try and make the effort to be at least civil to her for your brother's sake. We can't like everyone we meet but should always try to be mannerly towards them.

I cant really gove you an answer,but what I can give you is a way to a solution, that is you have to find the anglde that you relate to or peaks your interest. A good paper is one that people get drawn into because it reaches them ln some way.As for me WW11 to me, I think of the holocaust and the effect it had on the survivors, their families and those who stood by and did nothing until it was too late.