Long distance relationships? Commuting for a job?

.. I am curious, I have been with my boyfriend for over a year and a half, and we love eachother dearly. We both talk about getting married, and we have a strong and excellent relationship. But, we want to live in different places.

My whole family lives about 4 hours from us. We live here near his family because his Mom is single, and literally has no one but him to help her with stuff. (Dr. appointments, car trouble, money, anything that we help a parent with.

) So, I have tried to get him to move and relocate because honestly I am just not happy here, but he says he loves me more than anyone he's ever loved but that he just can't go and leave his Mom.So, anyways I got offered a job where my family lives, and its a good opportunity. It is in the same town as my family, and I kind of want to take it. My boyfriend said to go ahead and then we will still see eachother on our days off and he will come there, and me down here.So am I fooling myself to think this will work?

Asked by Claudia1981 26 months ago Similar questions: Long distance relationships Commuting job Lifestyle > Relationships.

Similar questions: Long distance relationships Commuting job.

It depends on the person I mean, you can see his point of view re his mom, which you should admire. You want to be with your family. Maybe there is no room for compromise and the relationship is doomed.

If you really think you would be happier, try the long distance thing, but everything in life is about balance and sacrifice. I know I did it for 8 years of my marriage and it was tough, but we did it for the sake of a better future we were building (eg, going to college, paying off student loans fast), and we managed thousands of miles apart, in separate countries, so I think 4 hours driving distance might not be so bad. It will clarify what is important in the relationship too, and stops you from sweating the small stuff.

Good luck! .

It can and will work for a while= but after time you will be giving him excuses why you can't see him on the weekend and him you so go ahead and try it ,but in the long run it will fail. Squeeky-changes-suck's Recommendations The Long-Distance Relationship Survival Guide Amazon List Price: $14.95 Used from: $7.98 Average Customer Rating: 4.0 out of 5 (based on 18 reviews) The Long Distance Relationship Guidebook Amazon List Price: $10.50 Used from: $7.99 Average Customer Rating: 5.0 out of 5 (based on 5 reviews) Long Distance Relationships: The Complete Guide Amazon List Price: $15.99 Used from: $13.95 Average Customer Rating: 4.0 out of 5 (based on 19 reviews) Long Distance Couples: An Activities Handbook for Strengthening Long Distance Relationships Amazon List Price: $6.95 Used from: $5.00 Average Customer Rating: 4.0 out of 5 (based on 12 reviews) Maybe if you look at these you can prove me wrong,and for your sake please try to prove me wrong.

If you move the relationship will fail for two reasons: the distance involved and the fact that you place yourself, your family and your job above the relationship. However, if you're unhappy with the relationship, it will fail anyway. It sounds like your bf is very caring, and you should applaud and support him in his desire to care for his mother.

On the other hand, it sounds like his mother may need to stop depending on her son so much and perhaps find a partner of her own. However, mnake no mistake, if you make him choose between his mother and you, you will lose out in the end. Long dstance relationships have as much chance of succeeding as winning the lottery.

Sooner or later, one of you will find someone interesting that doesn't include a 4 hour commute. Schelli's Recommendations Relationships for Dummies Amazon List Price: $21.99 Used from: $0.75 Average Customer Rating: 4.0 out of 5 (based on 7 reviews) Dating For Dummies (For Dummies (Lifestyles Paperback)) Amazon List Price: $21.99 Used from: $2.39 Average Customer Rating: 3.0 out of 5 (based on 40 reviews) Romance For Dummies (Pine Forge Press Series in Research Methods and Statistics) Amazon List Price: $4.95 Used from: $1.01 Average Customer Rating: 2.0 out of 5 (based on 4 reviews) Rekindling Romance for Dummies Amazon List Price: $21.99 Used from: $1.993 Average Customer Rating: 5.0 out of 5 (based on 1 reviews) .

It will work...but it will be hard work. Long distance relationships work if you put in the time and have great communication with your partner. Single Moms need to let their sons go and start a life for themselves.

Too many single Moms with sons let the son take the place of their husbands.... That alone is difficult being with a son that can't leave his Mother. On the plus side you have to love a man that takes care of his Mother. It's a dillemma at best..

1 My advice to you is to take the job and move back closer to your family and see if your relationship can survive the distance. If you both are struggling with it then he'll have a decision to make... and you want to know that he is willing to put you first, if not then better to know now. It's great he's so helpful to his mom but it sounds like he's become her crutch.Is there another sibling that can help with those responsibilities?

If not you will be second fiddle... and that is not fair to you. Better to find out now what his priorities are - you or his Mom. Good luck, Peace, BosM .

My advice to you is to take the job and move back closer to your family and see if your relationship can survive the distance. If you both are struggling with it then he'll have a decision to make... and you want to know that he is willing to put you first, if not then better to know now. It's great he's so helpful to his mom but it sounds like he's become her crutch.Is there another sibling that can help with those responsibilities?

If not you will be second fiddle... and that is not fair to you. Better to find out now what his priorities are - you or his Mom. Good luck, Peace, BosM.

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