Should children be asked to do 'family stuff' with the stepparent's family, i.e. reunions, holiday gatherings, etc?

Should children be asked to do 'family stuff' with the stepparent's family, i.e. Reunions, holiday gatherings, etc? Asked by CuriousDina 49 months ago Similar questions: children asked 'family stuff' stepparent's family reunions holiday gatherings Family.

Similar questions: children asked 'family stuff' stepparent's family reunions holiday gatherings.

Yes! Unless the stepparent will never meet the children. I know that may seem silly to say because one would think that the stepchildren would never meet their steparent but that is the only reason I would think that would make sense to exclude the stepchildren from this new family, unless of course you saw some reason for danger or a negative reflection upon them.

Both of my parents divorced when I was 8. Both of my parents are remarried and I am now nearly 30. I have several stepsiblings all whom I do my best to help spend time with all of our family members, as I am by far the eldest.

I feel it is crucial to know the extensions of familiy to feel like a "real" blood related family. On top of that the same goes with my fiance’s family. Both of his parents are divorced and remarried.

Combined orignially having 2 sets of parents now make 4 sets. We all get along famously and cherish in our knowing and sharing with each other. Albiet difficult to organize everyone during the holidays it is always wonderful when we can get together.It is more important to foster bonds and make friendships with people the children may hear stories about or come into later possible contact.

Children would most likely take it that there was some negative reflection upon themselves if not given the interaction with extensions of family. Please by all means don’t exclude them simply because the new family was not an original blood relation..

Yes. The way I see it is yes, because that stepparent accepted the child(ren) when (s)he married their spouse. (especially if it is a minor child, older children may not feel the same, my husband didn't with his stepmom's family) I look at it as that child becomes part of your family, just because they may not be blood related, they have become part of your responsibility.My husband is my daughter's stepfather and immediately involved her in his families activities, traditions, etc. He introduced her as his "new older daughter" and they both laugh about it, she was 9 when we got married.

The same year Lauren gained a new stepmother as well. I know her stepmother introduced her to everyone and she was immediately treated as part of the family and included in everything. When I was young, my father was killed and my mother eventually remarried.

My stepfather never once called us his stepchildren, we were just his kids; however, members of his family didn't recognize us as family members. We were never given gifts, told happy birthday or congratulated on our achievements. At a family reunion, we were given "visitor" name tags.

That was the final straw for my parents. They took their tags off and we left. Years later, his family tried to start a relationship with my sister and I, but it was too little too late for us, we just moved on without them.

My dad apologized to us over and over, but we told him it wasn't his fault. S family made it clear to everyone, that they didn't believe that stepchildren were really family members. I think having that happen to me as a kid, I decided that if I was ever in that position, I would never let that happen to the kids.

Sources: personal experience .

There are so many variables There are the issues of spending occasions with the non-custodial parents but that should be worked out in advance by parents acting like adults. And if it is a matter of Aunt Bessies wedding it depends who has visitation that day. You can ask but it means not having bad feelings if you don't get what you want.

I am assuming everything is cool with the adults and it's about the kids. If the children are very young there is no 'asking' involved. The most important thing is to keep the scheduling unemotional.

Instead of 2 sets of grandparents, cousins etc there may be 3 or 4 and a young child may have half-siblings eventually so you don't want to start splitting up the new family. If the children are school age it is time to be having the big holidays at home with drop-ins on family members who are celebrating at their homes. You might drop in on one set of in-laws on Christmas Eve, do Christmas morning at home, invite another set for dinner, do another drop in while dinner is being prepared and any who are more than 30 minutes away come to visit you.

With teenagers there is a little different situation, even without the step question, they are going to be backing out of some family duties. Not only is this part of becoming independent, they are often having peer plans. You might divide up the event, stop by Aunt Sophie's birthday for 45 minutes and then you can go to meet your friends.

Give them the option of not coming at all if there are no other teenagers coming. When my folks got married they brought 9 of us ages 7-21 together. We didn't have the step problem because the extended families were very far away.

But after about 4 years we were having in-laws, babies, going into the military, moving for jobs. The only 'asking' was the teenagers were to stay home when the guests were arriving even if they spent most of the time in their rooms. What is most important is that this doesn't become a bone of contention.

There are enough problems in any family and this becomes an opportunity to set a good example of how to get along in life. Galileogirl's Recommendations 7 Steps to Bonding with Your Stepchild Amazon List Price: $13.95 Used from: $6.99 Average Customer Rating: 4.5 out of 5 (based on 5 reviews) .

Of course they should the step family is part of the nuclear family once that marriage bond is formed.

If the children are young enough to still live at home, they should be included. Once the children move out, they should be invited. Unless they had no real relationship with the steps while they were at home.

They can decide weather or not to go on their own.

I cant really gove you an answer,but what I can give you is a way to a solution, that is you have to find the anglde that you relate to or peaks your interest. A good paper is one that people get drawn into because it reaches them ln some way.As for me WW11 to me, I think of the holocaust and the effect it had on the survivors, their families and those who stood by and did nothing until it was too late.