What are the differences between orgasms for men and women?

There are some differences between men’s and women’s orgasms. Specifically, women take longer to orgasm and are less likely to orgasm from penile-vaginal penetration. And if the goal is for two people to have an orgasm at the same time, then how long it takes you to come and what kind of stimulation gets you there -- well, those are things you need to be able to match up.

You need three things for that: You need a high degree of control over your own sexual response. You need a modality that provides enough of the right kind of stimulation to get you both to orgasm. You need a minute awareness of your partner’s level of arousal.

In short, you need control, modality, and attention.

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