Your friend asked you to be her maid of honor/ his best man. You are flattered but do not have the financial resources to allow you?

I would be honest with my friend. I would let them know that I was honored and flattered that they chose me as their Maid of Honor/Best Man but that, because of my current financial circumstances, I wouldn't be the best choice. I would express my deep regret but let them know that I would be happy to be an honored guest at their wedding.An additional note, this brings to mind the 1956 Bette Davis movie, "The Catered Affair".

Bette Davis plays a mother whose daughter (played by a young Debbie Reynolds) is getting married and the family winds up planning (due mainly to the Bette Davis's character's stubborn pride) a wedding that they could not really afford. The Debbie Reynolds character asked her best friend to be her Maid of Honor but her friend was forced to decline. She simply could not afford the kind of dress that would be required for such an affair.

Sometimes people wrongly prioritize weddings over marriages. What matters is the marriage itself, not the size or extravagance of the wedding. You should not put yourself into a perilous financial situation because of the choices someone else makes for their wedding.

You can support their marriage without being in the wedding party.

I would be honest and let them know I am honored they think so much of me and would tell them I cannot afford the dress etc. I am ordained so I would offer my services as a wedding present instead so I am still involved.

You tell them that although you are flattered and would really LOVE to do it, you are not in a financial position to do so. http://ts1.mm.bing.net/images/thumbnail.aspx?q=1432111154092&id=a1fd6eab92389330263c5d798895eede&url=http%3a%2f%2f

If they truly want you to be that, then they would offer to assist or offer suggestions. If they don't then they will smile and move on to the next person who will willing oblige.

And if they do do the latter, then you would not have put your self out financially for a position that was insincere. My niece is a Fashion designer, she see these people all the time (the Bridesmaids or unwilling people to a wedding party) - they are not happy! They are being asked to pay money for an outfit which they hate, and will never wear again; they loathe themselves for accepting, they loathe the bride for asking, and they loathe the dress they are wearing.

Now, that makes for a happy wedding photo! http://ts1.mm.bing.net/images/thumbnail.aspx?q=1470205397224&id=62ea44c55c9eeb673ff2ddbf8392607b&url=http%3a%2f%2fmag.awn.com%2fissue8.05%2f8.05images%2fsiggraph04_LOTR-TT_gollum.jpg If you decide to do it, at least negotiate with the bride to make sure that it is something which you will wear again. http://ts3.mm.bing.net/images/thumbnail.aspx?q=1422302844174&id=28754626f48b452e13058cc9469a4340&url=http%3a%2f%2f

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I cant really gove you an answer,but what I can give you is a way to a solution, that is you have to find the anglde that you relate to or peaks your interest. A good paper is one that people get drawn into because it reaches them ln some way.As for me WW11 to me, I think of the holocaust and the effect it had on the survivors, their families and those who stood by and did nothing until it was too late.