Can those family members who are planning the funeral request other family members not to bring their children?

These two family members are the deceased's grown daughters. They asked the deceased's 34-year-old granddaughter not to bring her 4-year-old child. They wanted her and her husband to leave their daughter with someone they didn't know.

They did end up going and sitting in the back, and not up front with the rest of the family. What do you make of this? It wasn't a private, by-invitation-only funeral.

I know people can dictate who they want at weddings, but a funeral? What say you, askville? Asked by cumulus 33 months ago Similar questions: family members planning funeral request bring children Society > Death.

Similar questions: family members planning funeral request bring children.

Never heard of such a thing I've heard of having family members assigned or reserved seats for a funeral but I've never heard of sitting arrangements other than that. In my own opinion, I find it a little rude to ask people not to attend a funeral they showed up for. Anyone who is at a funeral is there to show their respect..

Funeral etiquette As I stated in my discussion board comment, I feel that the family did the right thing by bringing their children and sitting in the back. I assume that they are from out of town, and didn't have anyone that they know and trust to watch the children--I cannot blame them for not wanting to leave their children with strangers. I would be a basket case if mine were with someone that I didn't know in a strange town.

And if the person who died was close to the child, I would especially want the child there. I don't feel it's appropriate to ask someone not to bring their child. We all have our different reasons why we might want our children there.

But then again, I also don't think it's really necessary for small children to be there at the funeral. Without knowing the actual circumstances, it's hard to say for sure, but at this point I would still stick with my first thoughts, that the parents were at least trying to be considerate to everyone else at the funeral by sitting in the back with their child. If they had no where that they felt comfortable leaving the child, of course they should bring him/her with them.

Hopefully, the child was not disruptive. But if it was, the parents could easily step outside that way. If this caused an uncomfortable situation for the family members, I'm sorry about that.

I'm sure people were more sensitive to the situation than normal, seeing as they all were grieving at the time. I hope it hasn't caused a major family issue! Poppet Sources: opinion .

Not a "private" service, but it is private property The answer to your question really depends on whether you want the moral answer, or the legal answer. Morally, and as a matter of etiquette, it is extremely ill-mannered to request that anyone be barred from attending the funeral of a family member. Although the four year old might not understand the solemnity of the occasion, it is still the great-granddaughter of the deceased, and the granddaughter's presence would at least have been honorary to the deceased.At the very least, the parents should not have been expected to leave the child with a stranger.

If there was concern that the child's behavior might disrupt the service, that could have been handled by simply removing the child from the room, had it come to that. As far as any legal requirement is concerned, funeral homes are privately owned properties. Private owners have the right to refuse admittance to anyone, as long as it does not rise to the level of illegal discrimination (characterized by race, religion, etc. ).

The funeral director's client is whomever is paying for the service. He might have chosen to adhere to the wishes of his client in having anyone, including the mother with her child, removed, but that would certainly create a scene not in keeping with the dignity of a funeral. For that reason, I think it is likely he would have refused to refuse admittance to anyone.

I must say that this is my opinion, because the laws of private property ownership are specific to each state and I can't post links to 50 statutes, but links can easily be found. Sources: This is my opinion.

NOPE. Can someone do it? Sure.It's a free country.

But, as in your situation, just because someone suggests something to you doesn't mean you have to obey them.

2 BTW~My now 3.5yr old is an old PRO at funerals, so if someone told me to keep my kid at home I'd remind them that our religion says otherwise ;) .

BTW~My now 3.5yr old is an old PRO at funerals, so if someone told me to keep my kid at home I'd remind them that our religion says otherwise ;).

" "Is it wrong not to attend a family members funeral,I have lost 5 family members.Pregnant. Don't think I can take it?" (10 answers) "Is it right to let family members use you no matter what? " "why should family members live in peace.

Is it wrong not to attend a family members funeral,I have lost 5 family members.Pregnant. Don't think I can take it? " (10 answers).

I cant really gove you an answer,but what I can give you is a way to a solution, that is you have to find the anglde that you relate to or peaks your interest. A good paper is one that people get drawn into because it reaches them ln some way.As for me WW11 to me, I think of the holocaust and the effect it had on the survivors, their families and those who stood by and did nothing until it was too late.