Was this another social blunder?

The other night I asked an old friend out to the movies. It turns out it might not have been such a good idea. I'd not seen Tom for maybe fifteen years, but we did get along pretty well back in the day.

I suggested meeting at Gold Class Cinemas in Pasadena (CA). Since I asked him out, I bought most of the goodies: a $49 bottle of Schramsberg sparkling wine, a $14 plate of onion grilled calamari, and a $19 New York steak for myself. The movie tickets came to $29 a piece.

The point is that we enjoyed ourselves in the luxury "reception room" and well as in the full service theater. The bill topped $200, but it was less than one thousandth of one percent of my salary,and it made a really big impression on Tom. When I said "let's do a movie" he had something else in mind: popcorn, an extra-large soda, and maybe a hot dog.

Tom told me, "I've never experienced anything like this at a movie theater. " It wasn't a good time because he thought it was all a big show and he is a simple guy. Asked by McGreat 23 months ago Similar questions: social blunder Food & Drink > Drink.

Ya, actually, I think it was a 'social blunder' It probably put your old friend in a very uncomfortable position. How could he ever reciprocate? An invitation to 'go to the movies'...is usually just that...a jeans and sneakers event... Dinner and the 'theater' would indicate a higher class evening out...and one might dress accordingly.

He probably had no clue just what going to the 'Gold Class Cinema' involved. Of course, if the 'movie' invitation came from the Trumpster...one might expect an extravagant evening as you described. I may be all wrong...and, if I am please accept my apology...but... Just the way your 'details' are stated...to me, it looks like 'BRAG, BRAG, BRAG.

Otherwise, each dollar amount wouldn't have had to be itemized...let alone, what % it was of your salary. Even if your heart was 'in the right place'...I do think this was a 'social blunder' on your part...and I'd really be surprised if you ever hear from old Tom again. Sources: Just my opinion HELENofTROY's Recommendations Putting On the Dog: A Guide to American Sophistication Amazon List Price: $12.95 Used from: $3.43 Work Like You're Showing Off: The Joy, Jazz, and Kick of Being Better Tomorrow Than You Were Today Amazon List Price: $14.95 Used from: $3.47 Average Customer Rating: 4.5 out of 5 (based on 24 reviews) .

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Well, if you had a good time, that is the main thing I rejoice that you are able to spend money like that, especially in this economy, but yep, I would have gone for the stinky buttery popcorn myself. Wining and dining is for other occasions than a movie with an old buddy. Even worse: Maybe he though you were trying to seduce him!

Good luck! .

2 The simple life is better....It maybe like you were showing off money then and even now in the question. Money doesn't make people happy...people/relationships do. Give the money to the poor instead....you may feel even better...I adopted a Hmong family of 10 kids to help all through the year...birthdays/Christmas...help paying bills etc...They really need a appreciate the help.

I found them throught the literacy council...the mom wanted to get her GED and I was supposed to teach her better English so she could understand her boss better.

The simple life is better....It maybe like you were showing off money then and even now in the question. Money doesn't make people happy...people/relationships do. Give the money to the poor instead....you may feel even better...I adopted a Hmong family of 10 kids to help all through the year...birthdays/Christmas...help paying bills etc...They really need a appreciate the help.

I found them throught the literacy council...the mom wanted to get her GED and I was supposed to teach her better English so she could understand her boss better.

3 Tough one to call, but I'd say that Tom might have felt uncomfortable and perhaps he could never afford to spend what you did that evening. He may have felt, "Geez! I could never afford to do this for McGreat!".

It depends on your relationship with Tom and how he deals with this sort of situation. Did he get embarrassed, or was he able to deal with your being able to afford such a nice evening and it didn't seem to bother him? How did you two divide up events and outings those 15 years ago?

Was it 50/50 then? I'm guessing you didn't make then what you do now.My grandmother always used to say, "Just be gracious and say Thank you", when someone treated me to something nice/expensive. But at times you can feel inferior, that the person is showing off and you can never do for them what they did for you.

Really depends on each person and that relationship.It was very nice of you to treat Tom like you did though. Maybe send Tom a little note explaining that you just wanted to treat him to a really nice time and hope he didn't take it as you were showing off, especially as you hadn't seen each other in so long.

Tough one to call, but I'd say that Tom might have felt uncomfortable and perhaps he could never afford to spend what you did that evening. He may have felt, "Geez! I could never afford to do this for McGreat!".

It depends on your relationship with Tom and how he deals with this sort of situation. Did he get embarrassed, or was he able to deal with your being able to afford such a nice evening and it didn't seem to bother him? How did you two divide up events and outings those 15 years ago?

Was it 50/50 then? I'm guessing you didn't make then what you do now.My grandmother always used to say, "Just be gracious and say Thank you", when someone treated me to something nice/expensive. But at times you can feel inferior, that the person is showing off and you can never do for them what they did for you.

Really depends on each person and that relationship.It was very nice of you to treat Tom like you did though. Maybe send Tom a little note explaining that you just wanted to treat him to a really nice time and hope he didn't take it as you were showing off, especially as you hadn't seen each other in so long.

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