How do you feel about obligatory gift-giving at the holidays?

I don't even know her, and you don't even like her!"Mom : "It's insert winter holiday here, that's why! Now take your allowance and get her something cute. "Personally, I hate the idea of being obligated to buy things for people just because of a holiday.

I would rather give special presents to people I consider important in my life, and I'd rather do it whenever I want, not just between December and January. How do you feel? Asked by Tozhra 48 months ago Similar questions: feel obligatory gift giving holidays Family.

Similar questions: feel obligatory gift giving holidays.

Be true to yourself and your inner feelings. "Giving" is not part of obligation, in this sense. A GIFT is a voluntary offering, done with good cheer, good feelings, with no expectation of compensation.. ......... neither for yourself or for the one who would ask/demand that you give simply because it's (insert winter holiday here).

Keep your heart in tune with your mind and give when YOU choose to give a gift! .

Depends on your beliefs.... I LOVE to give gifts at Christmas. For me, I love to give gifts to others the way Jesus was given as a gift to me. Its a symolic thing to celebrate his birth---and I dislike that it has become obligatory because that takes all celebration out of it.

Its not something I do out of obligation, but out of a desire to celebrate in this fashion. Think of giving a gift to Aunt Val as a chance to make her feel special....it doesn't have to cost alot or be worth alot, but a gesture to show that you thought of her, and thought her worthy of a gift is a wonderful thing. Sometimes gifts from those we don't expect them from are that much more meaningful..

I hate it! I just posted my own question about it. I hate receiving obligation presents and I hate giving them.

I know that most likely the person isn't going to like my gift (especially if it's someone I don't know well) and I know I won't like their gift. So why not call it even and just not do it? For years I have had a BBQ on my birthday (which is close to the 4th of July)and put on the invitation "no presents--just your presence" and people bring presents anyway!

My house is small, I don't need more stuff! Gift giving has its own karma. If someone gives you clothes, you're supposed to wear them when the person will see you.

If they give you a picture, it should be hanging up when they visit. Etc. Accepting a gift puts the burden on the person accepting.

I have enough burdens without trying to remember who gave me which ugly useless thing that I have to display because s/he is coming over. And if you hate the gift and ask for a gift receipt, the giver's feelings get hurt. No matter that the person has just given you something ugly, unwanted, unuseful, etc., now the burden is on you to find it attractive, to act like you want it, and find a special place in your home to display it.

ARGH. I don't want to feel like that and I don't want someone else to feel like that. The worse I ever felt about a gift I gave was something I made for my friend's new baby, a beautiful multi-colored mobile for over the crib.

I was over a few weeks later and her dogs were chewing it to shreds. I wanted to cry, thinking of the hours of work I put into it. She saw me looking at the dogs chewing on my gift and didn't say anything to explain how it got from the ceiling in the baby's room (where the dogs weren't allowed to go) to the living room floor.

Because, yes, I wanted to see it over the baby's crib and know the baby was looking at it and enjoying it. If I wanted to give a dog toy, I would have gone to Petco and bought one. There are good presents.

A good present is when you've lost your job and someone buys you the new hardcover by your favorite author, "just because"--knowing you can't afford it. Like you said, giving a gift because you want to, and for no other reason. Not out of obligation or because the calendar says so.

But personally I have so had it with bad obligation gifts that I've given up on all gifts.

Obligatory giving makes no sense. First of all, I think it’s rather silly that we’ve used the phrase ’insert winter holiday here’. This country is run amok enough with people being afraid to offend other people by the use of the word Christmas or even Hanukkah.

Questioner, my advice, please insert your the actual word you would use and the rest of us can just like it or leave it. Anyway, I’ve been struggling with this question since I was 16 or so. Why do we buy gifts out of feelings of obligation?

Because we’re told that’s how it’s done. Well, it’s pointless. The sad reality is that most people will re-gift, or throw the gift in the dust pile or trash, or just be offended by how thoughtless the gift was.

Then there’s the person that gives you a gift and then out of obligation you feel that you must buy one for them simply because they bought a gift for you. It’s ridiculous! I could have just bought the gift that I wanted myself and same for the person to whom I gave a gift.My philosophy is this: 1) Buy gifts for your children to give them great Christmas memories (as well as the other family traditions you may want to include).

2) Buy presents for people when you happen to run across the perfect gift for them to show them that you care about them (For example; I wouldn’t have bought my dad (an outdoorsman with a zany sense of humour) a gift at all this year until I found the perfect book that will make him laugh and also make him think of me: "How to Sh*t In the Woods" is the title. It may be a little distasteful to some, but I know it will give him a ’kick in the pants’.3) It can be a simple gift or lunch at a nice place to tell someone thanks for helping you out in life when no one else could. Anyway, yes, obligatory gift giving rarely does good for the giver or receiver.

STOP RE-GIFTING NOW BY NOT BUYING thoughtless presents to begin!.

I agree I agree. It's hard to buy gifts and if that person you are shopping for is not someone you have any great love for, it's even harder. That's why I only buy for my parents and nieces.

Everyone else is out of luck .

I cant really gove you an answer,but what I can give you is a way to a solution, that is you have to find the anglde that you relate to or peaks your interest. A good paper is one that people get drawn into because it reaches them ln some way.As for me WW11 to me, I think of the holocaust and the effect it had on the survivors, their families and those who stood by and did nothing until it was too late.