If a leader in your place of worship was having an unacceptable affair with a member of the congregation, would you confront them?

I refer you to 1 Timothy 5:1 "Do not rebuke an older man harshly, but exhort him as if her were your father; Treat younger men as brothers, older women as mothers, and younger women as sisters..." A church congregation is more than just a bunch of people who worship together. It should be a family, and whether we agree with what our family members do or not, we still should treat them with love and help them see the error of their ways. My personal viewpoint on this topic is that if either party is married, this is definitely wrong behavior.

If you are absolutely sure that infidelity is the issue, then you would be right to approach the minister, tell him what you know, and voice your concerns about the effect this affair will have on the church body. We are all only human, even ministers, and you need to approach the subject with brotherly love and concern, not angry accusations. He may take your words to heart and end the affair, or he may not.In that case, you'll have to decide whether you want a shepherd who sets a poor example for his flock, or whether it's time to move on.

Just be aware that no church (or church member) is perfect, and while adultery is a sin, so is lying, stealing, gossiping, gluttony.... and no sin is worse than another in God's eyes.

In this relationship, one person is in a position of trust (the congregation trusts the leader to maintain him/herself as an example). I would probably go to that person, in private, and explain things I had seen or heard firsthand, telling that person how those actions were being perceived, and then ask for an explanation. One of three things would happen, I think: she/he would refuse to answer and would deflect to another subject, he/she would choose to tell me a lie, or she/he would tell me the truth.

Unless I have seen irrefutable proof of the unacceptable affair firsthand, I would not know whether I was hearing the truth or a lie in the second two cases. I could proceed no further. We hold our leaders, especially our leaders of morality and behavior, to a higher standard.

What we might excuse in a friend becomes inexcusable when someone is holding themselves up or being held up by others as an example of how to live a morally correct life. Yet these people are also human, subject to the same foibles and temptations as everyone else. Still, people in such positions have a choice as to whether to continue in their position or step down.

Perhaps, by communicating my concerns, the leader would re-evaluate their actions and how those actions could be interpreted. Even if there was no wrong-doing, the leader might change behavior in order to cast no doubt.

I've personally seen a situation like this occur, and the right course of action is to take it to the church's board first. Not only is it the proper procedure, it's also a lot less uncomfortable for you as you get to avoid a direct confrontation. I think the concept of leaving his personal life alone is an outdated one; everyone's work life (yes, leading a religious group still counts) bleeds into their personal life and it works the other way around as well.

No. It is never right to "confront" people over their personal lives. If you think the leader of your church is a hypocrite then change your place of worship.It's a little different if the person is an employee of the congregation which is run by a board of directors or similar, then it would be appropriate to make your feelings known to members of that board.

I cant really gove you an answer,but what I can give you is a way to a solution, that is you have to find the anglde that you relate to or peaks your interest. A good paper is one that people get drawn into because it reaches them ln some way.As for me WW11 to me, I think of the holocaust and the effect it had on the survivors, their families and those who stood by and did nothing until it was too late.