Should I stay or should I leave my cheating husband? my husband has always cheated in the 30yrs together?

MY HUSBAND HAS ALWAYS CHEATED IN THE 30YRS TOGETHER.... my husband has AlWAYS cheated on me. I initially stayed because our children were young. Now they our out of the house and we decided that financially it would be better to stay in the house since we bothsaid we would not get married again.

I have been married only to my husband but I am his 3rd wife. He was divorced when I met him. I am still in love with my him and would like to try to reconcile.

We have never tried counseling because he refuses. He says that he cares about me but he is not in love with me. He has always had only 1 nightstands.

He is currently visiting a woman out of state. He says there is no commitment with her. I have expressed to him about my desire reconcile but he says its over.

Should I fight for this crazy relationship or move on. I feel if we would go to counseling it would save our marriage. I have seen with his other 2 marriages how it destroyed a family.

I am very close to my stepchildren and grandchildren and I see this forever changing if I leave Asked by Ina 42 months ago Similar questions: STAY LEAVE CHEATING HUSBAND CHEATED 30YRS Lifestyle > Relationships.

Similar questions: STAY LEAVE CHEATING HUSBAND CHEATED 30YRS.

You are living in Purgatory. This question doesn't really even need an answer. The answer is in the question.

Being married 3x is ususally something that doesn't phase me. I know to stay away from that. But you know he's cheating and has no desire to stop.

He refuses counseling because he knows what they'd say. How are you on his side. "he only had one night stands".

He's still cheating. And he condones it. He knows he wrong, and he also knows you're not going to do anything about it.

What's going to happen if he brings you home an STD or aids. Are you still going to say,"They were only one night stands". He goes away with women out of state, but it's OK there isn't any commiitment.

He's taking you for a fool. No I don't believe you should fight for this marraige, it isn't a marraige. Yes, don't embarrass yourself anymore, leave him.

I'm sure you'll be able to maintain a relatioship with his children and grandchildren. Don't let that be your excuse. He even has the nerve to tell you he cares for you but he's not in love with you.

What exactly are you to him?! A convenience. You deserve more than that.

Get out and find someone who loves you and respects. I don't beleive what you're putting up with. He says he doesn't love you, but you're scrambling for excuses to stay with him.

He's using you, he has no repect for you, you're a joke to him. Don't be this mans fool. Get out, go quickly.

There is better out there for you. Good luck, Do the right thing! Sources: My Opinion .

Newuser, I'm so sorry for the pain you are in. The last fifteen years of my first marriage were a lot like what you are describing. He had one affair after another.At first he promised to stop and we went to marriage counseling.

Toward the end he gave me the, "I love you, but I'm not in love with you. " line. I hung on to him like my life depended on it.

I told myself it was for the kids, but they were all out of the house by the last few years. I now realize it was fear and low self esteem that kept me in the relationship. I don't have words to express the relief I felt when it was finally over.

I continued to love him for a while, but I got over that quickly once I found out how much better I felt without him. My relationship with my kids improved a lot once they saw how confident and capable I became once I was free of him. They have a lot a respect for me now that they didn't when I was his foot wipe.

They will certainly love you a lot more when you learn to love yourself. I urge you to leave this relationship and start your life over. You certainly don't know for sure that you will never remarry.

Once you are mentally healthy again and your self esteem is mended you may find that you are ready for a real marriage. But that's a ways off. Right now you just need to make the break and take your life one day at a time.

I was alone for ten years after my divorce. During that time I learned that I could support myself quite well and that I didn't need a man to make me complete.At that point I started dating again and finally married a man I love dearly who loves me in return. I thank God for the courage to start my life over at age 50.

I hope you, too are able to do the same. This is my opinion in answer to your question. I hope it helps you.

Only you can know what's right for you. Sources: personal opinion pattiann's Recommendations Too Good to Leave, Too Bad to Stay: A Step-by-Step Guide to Help You Decide Whether to Stay In or Get Out of Your Relationship Amazon List Price: $15.00 Used from: $2.36 Average Customer Rating: 4.5 out of 5 (based on 99 reviews) It's Called a Breakup Because It's Broken: The Smart Girl's Break-Up Buddy Amazon List Price: $13.95 Used from: $6.95 Average Customer Rating: 4.5 out of 5 (based on 124 reviews) Rebuilding: When Your Relationship Ends, 3rd Edition (Rebuilding Books; For Divorce and Beyond) Amazon List Price: $16.95 Used from: $9.15 Average Customer Rating: 4.5 out of 5 (based on 80 reviews) The Grief Recovery Handbook : The Action Program for Moving Beyond Death Divorce, and Other Losses Amazon List Price: $13.00 Used from: $2.74 Average Customer Rating: 4.5 out of 5 (based on 59 reviews) Married to Me: How Committing to Myself Led to Triumph After Divorce Amazon List Price: $23.95 Used from: $14.61 Average Customer Rating: 5.0 out of 5 (based on 2 reviews) .

This is a tough one. It might look like a very simple situation. Your husband cheats, doesn't love you, why stay?

The truth is, after having children together, being a stepmom and a grandmother, living in a home together, and going through life together for 30 years, you are talking about a complete life change, not just a "divorce". Will you be allright financially? Will you be able to support yourself, and be on your own?

I know it will be a hard move, and it's not easy, especially for older women, to start all over again in life. If you are close to your children, stepchildren and grandchildren, I don't see why that should change. It sounds like you have put up with a lot to keep the family together.

Their feelings for you are probably as strong as yours are for them. Would they blame you for leaving? It doesn't mean you are walking out of their lives, it just means you are standing up for yourself and are tired of being a doormat.

I think you better give up on reconciling with this man. It sounds like he doesn't know what real love is if he has been cheating on you for 30 years. Sounds like he just likes the thrill of a new experience.

Love involves committment and caring, and appreciation of your spouse and all they do. It doesn't sound like he has this in him. If there is any way you can do this without hardship, I'd say go, and go now.

You will probably never get what you are looking for from this man. He sounds like he has the mind of a perpetual teenager, and will probably never really love anyone. I'm sorry you've had to go through this all these years, good luck in trying to make a good life for yourself..

There is no doubt that you should move on as hard as it seems, you need to start living for yourself. He has made it very clear that the relationship and marriage is over. Find an apartment or sm.

Home to rent and get going on your life. He seems to be dragging you down and destroying your self esteem. My sister is in the same boat and I understand what you are going through.

I can not understand why she is staying. She cares for his illegitimate son that he fathered. (the mom is the age of their daughters).

My sister has bonded with this young boy and has cared for him since he was a month old. They are divorced but they are still living with each other. They had been married for almost 20 years.

She says the same thing, she can not afford to move out. So she is constantly being used by him. She is there for cleaning his house, using her car, and sex when ever he wants it cause she thinks that if she does all these things that he will fall in love with her again!

No he won't he has moved on. I feel that for your best interest you should move on. Good luck in what ever you decide.

Sources: personal opinion ragrug_lady's Recommendations The Seven Principles for Making Marriage Work: A Practical Guide from the Country's Foremost Relationship Expert Amazon List Price: $14.95 Used from: $4.72 Average Customer Rating: 5.0 out of 5 (based on 135 reviews) maybe this would help .

Go get a boyfriend of your own... IMHO, if he is saying no to trying counseling, he won't even be into it if you manage to drag him in. Guys are dumb, bottom line (and I am one). So go get something of your own on the side.

IF you leave him, don't go far and you can still be a part of the kids lives. G'luck.

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Why do people stay in relationships that they are not happy with.

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I cant really gove you an answer,but what I can give you is a way to a solution, that is you have to find the anglde that you relate to or peaks your interest. A good paper is one that people get drawn into because it reaches them ln some way.As for me WW11 to me, I think of the holocaust and the effect it had on the survivors, their families and those who stood by and did nothing until it was too late.