How can my partner and I get out of a sex rut?

If you've been in a sexual rut lately, have a chat with your partner about what's been holding you back from feeling sexy, what you miss about your intimate life together, and what you've been daydreaming about that really turns you on. Tell your partner about how you touched yourself, and how good it felt. Swap stories of sexual fantasies.

If you're having trouble getting the conversation going, try journaling first. Engaging in some free writing -- about what you've experienced, how it's affected your life both in and out of the bedroom, and how you want things to change -- can help you clarify and eventually verbalize the thoughts that have been swirling around your head. Or you can turn the conversation into a game.

One we like to play is To Tell the Truth. It's similar to the game Two Truths and a Lie, in which players present to a group of people two true things they've done in the past, plus one outrageous lie. The more difficult it is to distinguish between the truths and the lie, the more fun it is!

In this case, however, you're only sharing with your partner, and the point is to be more open about your sexual desires, and about what you've been feeling lately. You could also play a sexy game of Truth or Dare, or pick up an actual, sex-specific board game, to facilitate your discussion. Once you get going, talking can easily lead to doing.

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